March 26, 2008 at 9:41 am (Friendship, Loneliness, Relationship, Trust)
Tags: friends, friendship. relationship
They say true friends don’t cost anything. They say true friends conquer everything. They say say true friends is for everyone to find.
Are there anyone left? Have all the True Friends been used up and disposed of?
You say you want to only want to be my friend, and you don’t want to hurt me or push me or make me do anything against my will.
So why are you trying to own me and rule me? You cant be my friend, if all you want is to change me and make me something I’m not.
If you want a friend – a true friend. You have to accept them as they are and respect the fact that they are different and unique.
But what do you do? You pick on me and try to change me to please you. And for you to get your will. And all to make you happy.
How can I be your friend? If the price is all mine, my happiness and my sanity? Friends don’t own each other, they respect each other. I might be lonely and sad, but don’t think I’m so desperate that I will let you own me.
If your my friend, you respect me.
If your my friend, you like me for who I am.
If your my friend, you don’t dictate me.
If your my friend, you don’t try to own me.
If your my friend, you don’t insult me and call me names.
If your my friend, you have patience with me.
That’s to much to ask? Maybe? But its the truth. I give you a second chance and you only hurt me again. I am always willing to believe that people can like me and maybe one day someone will, but what’s the price? What do friendship cost? Its not all that free…
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February 26, 2008 at 5:02 am (Loneliness)
Tags: alone, family, friends, Loneliness
How can you be happy alone?
Oh yes, some people might say they are happy and alone. But are they truly alone? Usually not. You have your family, your friends, your colleagues and your neighbours. Is that being alone? No!
How can I be happy alone?
Sleep? I wake up, don’t need to but I can if I feel like it. Or I can stay in bed all day. If I choose to get up, do I bother put on clothes or just use some all rags that look awful. Why bother? No one would miss me if I stayed in bed all day. No one would see what I wear or not. Or when I sleep, day-time or night-time its no different.
Food? I eat if I get hungry, maybe once a day. Or less if the money are tight.
Outside? No one talks to me, no one want to admit they know me. No one to visit or nowhere to go. Today’s society costs to much to have fun in, if your broke you loose.
Entertainment? Talking to people online or playing WOW (World of Warcraft) or watch TV. If I’m lucky someone talk to me, even luckier I get to play and do something in WoW. But most days ends sitting alone, in real life and in my online WoW.
And if anyone see your lonely or miserable, they leave you be cause you need time to cope. I don’t need time alone. I’m always alone. I don’t know how you can cure loneliness, with leaving people to continue be alone.
How can you say your happy alone? When you don’t know what being alone is.
I don’t have a family, I don’t have friends, I don’t have workmates, all I have in life is my cat. Is that how its suppose to be, sorry your to much of a wasted time.
Don’t say your happy alone, before you tried it.
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February 21, 2008 at 2:17 am (Friendship, Relationship)
Tags: aquaintances, disapointment, friends, hurt
Thats a hard thing to figure out. Someone comes and say they wanna be your friend, but they only want you when they need you. If you need a hand to hold or a shoulder to cry one or maybe just a hug. Then they are always busy. And when your not needed anymore or they figured out they found something better, your thrown away like garbage.
Why is friendship becoming a consumable? Something you use and throw away when you get a new, like a monthly magazine. Future feature; “Subscribe to our friendship service - you get a new fresh friend every 4th week”.
And if your someones friend why dont they tell you if something is wrong, not just avoid you. Cause maybe your not that much of a friend to them, they dont care cause they dont need you at that time …
I cant do this game. I cant be a friend on demand, and then put away again after use. I want you and need you to be my friend, but out friendship has to mean something to you too. Its not a one way thing.
Friends? Or aquaintances? What shall it be?
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February 17, 2008 at 4:46 am (Friendship, Relationship, Trust)
Tags: abuse, friends, hurt, loyalty, relationtionship, Trust
How can I trust anyone? When all you do is backstabb me? I let you hurt me again and again and again, and I forgive you and believe you … And every time it goes a few days or a few weeks, and you hurt me again. your stories always sounds good and your excuses is hard to crack… But I always end up getting the feeling your lying to me. It hurts to know I think your a friend, and you say you are, but you never act like it is true.
How can I trust you? You break your promises. You are a liar. You hide the truth to just end up hurting me even more. You avoid me and ignore me, until you think i forgotten and are in a forgiving mood. Why cant you see that this is why I don’t trust you, and you are ruining me and my life. If you are my friend and you say you are, and i cant even trust you how can i trust anyone ever again.
Every time you break a promise you break a part of my heart and my trust … You and the others have shattered my heart by now … It’s soon nothing left and you can’t just go get a new and start again.
I’m cold and distant and you think I’m to much work to bother getting close to … maybe you have a cure for my heart and my trust, if only your honest and kind. I’m not outgoing and social. I’m not cheerful and happy. All I get told is that I’m to bitch and harsh. I joke and I insult you, not cause I mean it, but to beat you to it. It’s better you mad at me for being rude, than that you get close enough to hurt me. I might loose you that way, but its better to loose you than to let you hurt me. If you was “for real” you would understand it and see it and stay …. but no one do.
And neither did you …
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February 16, 2008 at 12:49 am (Friendship, Relationship)
Tags: abuse, friends, hurt, loyalty, relationtionship, Trust
Why do you hate me?
Why do I never fit in?
Why is all I do always wrong?
Why is everything going wrong?
Why do everyone lie?
Why? Why? Why? Why?
That’s always it. Why?
Everything is always why. And no matter what, no one will never answer you on that. How can you ever fix whats wrong if no one will answer any of your questions?
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